An Evangelion Christmas Carol
by Shritistrang
Summary: Gendo Ikari is being visited by three spirits... but will they be enough to change the way he is viewing the world?
1. The warning

It was a couple of days before Christmas. And while Christmas was a Western holiday, it found its way in the hearts of many people in Japan. It was no difference in Tokyo-2 and Tokyo-3. There were Christmas decorations hanging in the school the three Evangelion pilots were attending. Even Misato had a small, cheap plastic Christmas tree in her apartment.

NERV headquarters were not decorated. There was no sign of festivities anywhere, as the staff members were worried that the next Angel might attack any day.

Commander Ikari was sitting in his dark, gloomy office, going through some important papers. As he took one, a small envelope was slipping out of the filestack. The commander frowned. There was a small mistletoe sticker on the envelope.

He opened it to find a Christmas gift card from Dr. Ritsuko Akagi. He frowned. "What a foolish nonsense…" he grumbled and threw the card into the trash. He never knew why people had enjoyed this silly holiday. It was time-consuming and expensive… an American invention that distracted the people from their duty. He never knew why Yui liked it so much…

Yui… every time he thought of her, he was reminded of his plans. Instrumentality… once it occurred, there would be no more of this. And with these thoughts, he went back to work.

He didn't get to work in peace and quiet, though. He frowned when he heard a knock on his office door. "Come in," he said in his usual, emotionless voice.

The door opened and an unusually cheerful Major Katsuragi stepped in. "Good morning, sir!" Misato smiled. "And a merry Christmas to you, too."

Gendo frowned. "Is there anything you need, Major?"

"Well, no. That is… actually, there is something… kind of."

"Yes or no? Don't waste my time like this!"

"Well, I've been hoping… it's Christmas, isn't it? And I wondered if we all could take a day off tomorrow… it would give us a chance to relax from everything. And I think Shinji and the girls have earned some time away from all the tests. I even thought we could have a little Christmas celebration together…"

"Major Katsuragi!" Gendo pushed his glasses up his nose as he looked at her sternly. "Let me make one thing crystal clear… I don't see any reason why tomorrow… or today, for that matter… should be treated differently from any other day. Our last defeat over the Angel wasn't exactly what we could call a glorious victory… we need to be prepared for the next attack around the clock. There were synchronisation tests scheduled for tomorrow, right?"

"But Commander…" Misato said, surprised at the harshness in his voice. "Surely it can't be wrong to let go every once in a while… after all, Christmas is only once a year."

Gendo picked up his papers and looked at them. "My mind is made up. If that is all, major, I would like to get back to work."

Misato sighed a bit. Why did she even expect anything else? "Yes, sir…"

* * *

It was late in the evening when Gendo went to sleep. As always, he didn't leave HQ for the night… he had a small room down here, so he could be early for work every day. It was similar to Rei's apartment in a way as it contained only the most essential furniture inside: A bed, a small table with a chair and a metal locker with a small assortment of clothes… most of them the same clothes he always wore at work. At the end of the bed, a small chest was standing. It contained the very few personal items he possessed.

Like he always did every evening, he took a final look at the Evangelion Hangar before going to bed. He usually left with the last technicians that closed the hangar doors before they left.

Evangelion Unit 01's enormous, monstrous face was directly in front of it. He stared at it for a couple of minutes, when it happened.

He barely was able to suppress a gasp. Shocked by what he saw, he took a quick step backwards. One of the technicians that had been staying behind looked up. "Is everything all right, sir?"

"Did you… did you see anything unusual about Unit 01?" the commander asked.

The technician looked at the metal face of the Evangelion and shrugged. "No… it looks as ugly as always. Why are you asking, sir?"

"N-nothing. I think I just need some sleep."

The man laughed. "As do we all, sir. As do we all. I wish you a good night."

While the hangar doors were slowly closing, Gendo could not banish the strange image he saw from his head. Was it real? Or had it just been his imagination? But for a moment, he had seen the lovely face of his wife, Yui Ikari, instead of the Evangelion's iron grimace.

He shook his head. What was wrong with him? It certainly wasn't like him to have such hallucinations. Maybe he had been working too hard. For a moment, he thought back at Major Katsuragi's request for a day off, only to quickly abandon the thought.

While he was walking down the corridor that was leading to the room he slept in, he already thought back at his work, the Instrumentality project and SEELE. It was pretty dark, as it was always after all the other staff members had left. Gendo wasn't bothered by the darkness. It helped him not to get distracted and focus on the really important things.

However, a sudden noise made him turn around in confusion. But there was nothing there. The corridor behind him was completely empty.

'Now I'm beginning to hear things,' he thought as he kept walking. 'Maybe I should let Ritsuko check me up tomorrow…'

A strong, chilly gust of wind suddenly blew past him as he finished that thought. And this was really weird… there were no windows down here. NERV Headquarters were situated deep below the earth, no wind could possibly reach this corridor.

Was there someone down here? Someone who dared playing a joke on him? However, he couldn't think of anyone who might have the guts to do something like this to him, the commander. Still, he couldn't help but feel that there was someone near…

He sharply turned away and kept walking until he reached the door to his room. He went inside and closed the door from the other side. If there was someone following him, he would take the intruder by surprise. Quickly and quietly, he took a revolver and pressed his body against the wall next to the door. As soon as the spy opened it and came in, he would put the gun to his head, forcing him to surrender.

There was someone coming inside the room. However, this someone chose a pretty unusual way of doing so: Instead of opening the door, the person simply stepped through the door as if it was made of air… or rather, floated through it. Since this person was nothing but a translucent, hovering, ghostly figure that looked directly at the commander of NERV.

Gendo let out another gasp. His first thought was: 'Angel attack!' and out of a reflex, he fired his gun. The bullet harmlessly flew past the spooky spectre's see-through head and put a hole in the door.

Sighing, the figure took a look at the hole, before shaking her head and looking back at a shaking Gendo. "Hello, husband."

Gendo dropped the revolver. He scooted backwards until he touched the wall on the other side of the room. His fingers were twitching. "Y-yui…"

The floating form of Yui Ikari smiled and nodded. "Yes, it is me, Gendo. I was allowed to leave the prison the Evangelion Unit has become to give you a warning."

"A… a warning?" Gendo mumbled, not believing his ears or eyes.

"Yes," the ghost nodded. "A warning. A warning of what will happen if you don't change your ways."

"My… my ways?" Gendo was slowly getting back his wits. "Yui… everything I did here, everything I created, all of my plans… I only did it for you! It was so we could be with each other again."

"So you basically want to give up any person living on this planet? The loss of identity is the same as death, Gendo. Take a look at me…" She looked down at her spectral form. Now Gendo could see that she was bound with heavy iron chains, that were as transparent as she was. "What do you think why I'm wearing these chains? We should have never played with forces we don't understand, Gendo… The Dead Sea Scrolls! Adam! The Angels! I confess I was curious… I wanted to learn as much about all of this as I could… but in death, my spiritual form was bound to the Evangelion Unit by these chains. I forged this chain by myself, while I was living, Gendo… and I can already see yours. It is much longer and far heavier than mine."

Gendo looked down at his feet, but could not see the chains his wife was speaking of. "I don't understand… what is it you want from me?"

"I can't stay here for much longer, Gendo," Yui said sadly. "So listen to what I say: You will be haunted… by three spirits."

Gendo froze. He felt as if he had heard that somewhere before, but couldn't quite place it. "Three… spirits?" he murmured.

"That's correct," the ghost of Yui nodded. "They will help you find your path. Without their help, I'm afraid you and this world will be doomed. Expect the first to come at One." She glanced over to the electronic clock display on the wall. "The second one will arrive the next night at the same hour. The three will arrive next night, at midnight."

She came closer to him. Her ghostly hand touched his cheek. He shuddered. Her touch was icy cold.

"We won't see each other again after this," she sighed. "Not in this life… I wish you the best of luck, Gendo Ikari… there might be yet a chance to save your soul. Take a look at me and pray that it doesn't happen to you." She slowly floated backwards.

"No… Yui… please, don't leave!" Gendo begged. He stumbled to his feet and ran after the apparition. "Not yet! Please, stay a little longer…"

"Goodbye, my husband…" the ghost whispered as she passed through the still closed door. "And take care of our Shinji…"

Then she was gone. Gendo violently pulled open the door, but there was no trace left of her.

His glance fell upon the electronic clock while her words were going through his head: "You will be haunted by three spirits. Expect the first to come at One…"

* * *

Author's Note:

This will be a pretty short story. Since I was thinking of this story and it's Christmas soon, I thought this would be fitting. And who would be fitting the role of Scrooge better than Gendo?

This story will probably only have five chapters. Therefore, I will have a much easier time to finish it than with my other project. In fact, I will try to finish it before Christmas or maybe even on one of the Christmas days.


	2. The first spirit

Gendo woke early at six, the same time as always. He sat up in bed and shook his head as he reached for his glasses. "This is nonsense," he murmured. "That was a bad dream, nothing more." He was sure of that. He had several bad dreams of Yui ever since she died. The last one had been almost one year ago, but he still couldn't see any other explanation. "Three spirits? The ghost of Yui? My own chains? Bah! Humbug!"

He blinked. Now why did he say that?

He didn't give it another thought and instead got ready for work as always. For him, it was a normal day. No restless spirits. No wives that returned from the dead. Not even an Angel attack.

He looked into the hangar and carefully watched the giant form of Evangelion Unit 01. He didn't really know what he expected. However, the biomechanical colossus didn't budge an inch.

In the evening, Gendo almost forgot about the strange incidents of last night. He went to bed as usual, and nothing out of the ordinary happened. No ghost or spirit appeared.

Gendo put his glasses down and went into his bed. Just a few minutes later, he was asleep.

However, deep in the night, he suddenly woke up. Putting on his glasses, he took a quick glance at the clock... it was one o'clock.

He never woke up in the night, unless there was an emergency at HQ. He took a look around... everything was as quiet as usual.

But then, in the corners of his eyes, he saw a soft light, coming from above. He looked... and froze. Up there, hovering directly under the ceiling, was none other than his only son, Shinji. Or at least someone who looked like him. Instead of his normal clothes, the school uniform or the plugsuit, he was dressed in what looked like a red and white bathrobe. He also had what looked like a mistletoe in his hair. He sat there, as if there was an invisible cushion above Gendo's bed, with crossed legs, and read a book that was lying in his lap.

The view was so strange and absurd that Gendo wasn't able to say anything for a few seconds. Then he asked: "Shinji?"

Shinji... or at least the spirit who wore his face smiled and closed the book, keeping a finger between the pages, as he looked down at the bewildered NERV commander. "Good evening, father!"

Hearing his son's voice somehow broke Gendo out of his stupor. He frowned angrily at Shinji. "What do you think you are doing here at this late hour? Who let you in? Does Major Katsuragi know you're here? And why are you wearing such a ridiculous outfit?"

"Please calm yourself, father," Shinji said as he uncrossed his legs and slowly came hovering down. He stopped next to his father, but his feet still didn't touch the floor. "I have come here to show you a few glimpses of your past. Didn't mother tell you I was coming?"

Gendo recalled his conversation with Yui. "That... was a dream," he proclaimed.

Shinji smiled. "I'm afraid not. I am the Ghost of Christmas Past."

"Stop speaking nonsense! And come down here! How are you doing this?" He gestured at Shinji's feet, which were still hovering above the cold floor.

Shinji shook his head. "For someone who believes in the prophecy of Instrumentality, you can be quite narrow-minded at times... mother already mentioned it, in her diary." He briefly lifted the book he was holding.

"That... that is your mother's diary?" Gendo narrowed his eyes. "Give it to me! I've kept it ever since she died. You have no right to touch this!" And he held out his hand. Under normal circumstances, everyone who knew him would have complied. Especially Shinji.

But this time, Shinji looked at the book thoughtfully before opening it up again. "Here she writes: 'I've asked Gendo if he wants to join me for dinner at the nice restaurant I found the other day. However, he declined. Sometimes, I wonder if his work is more important to him than I am.' Tell me father, is this true?"

Gendo slowly lowered his hand. For a moment, it seemed as if he was lower his gaze. He didn't do it, instead, he just sighed. "Your mother has always been the most important person to me. You should know that."

"Yes, the most important person. But more important than anything else? What about me? Do you hate me"

"I never said that."

"I know. But then again, you barely spoke with me at all." Shinji smiled sadly as he sat down next to his father. He put the book down between them. "Why do you hate Christmas?"

That question came out of nowhere. "It's a waste of time," Gendo said. "People spend their money for trivial nonsense and sentimental feelings. It's a gaijin invention that is only used to make money."

"The Americans didn't invent Christmas," Shinji said. "But that's a common mistake people make nowadays..." He stood up and reached out his hand. "Come with me."

Gendo looked at his son's hand. "Why? Where do you want to go, at this late hour?"

"Come on. I want to show you something."

Gendo was still not taking his son's hand, nor was he standing up, for that matter. "I don't see why I should listen to you," he said. "After all, I am not just your father, but also your commander."

"You won't lose anything by doing so," Shinji reminded him. "I just want to help you remember a few things of your past. You're not afraid of the past, aren't you?"

Gendo frowned. He wasn't afraid of anything. He reached out to take Shinji's hand.

Shinji smiled when he saw his father's for once ungloved hand. "See, that wasn't so hard. Their hands touched and a soft glow surrounded them.

* * *

When the light vanished, they were in a different room. Gendo was surprised. "What... what is this? Where are we?"

"Don't you recognize this room?" Shinji smiled.

Gendo saw a richly decorated Christmas Tree standing in the corner. He saw dozens of colorfully wrapped presents lying underneath. The whole room was brimming with light coming from candles. Candles on the tree, candles standing on the table, candles on the windowsill. A huge plush reindeer was lying on the couch Gendo and Shinji were sitting on. Outside, snowflakes were falling.

Gendo slowly got up. "Of course..." he murmured. "That was before you were born... Yui wanted to spend the Christmas holidays with me, so she rented this small cabana in the mountains... at first, I didn't want to come, but she was persistent..." He looked at the decorated room. "All of this, she did for me..."

"She did it for both of you," Shinji said.

Gendo suddenly turned his head sharply and looked at his son. "Wait... I never told you about this! How can you know?"

"Don't try to think about it too much, father," Shinji said.

Suddenly, the door opened. A young woman with brown hair, wearing a nice dress came in. She was carrying a metal plate with a huge, roasted turkey on it.

Gendo's eyes widened. "Yui!" he gasped. She looked through the room, but her gaze went right past him. He wanted to touch her shoulder, but his hand went right through her.

As Yui put down the turkey on the table, Gendo looked at his hand in irritation. "What in the name of..."

"She can't see us," Shinji explained. "We are here as observers. Nobody can see, hear or touch us. These are just your memories."

As Yui put down the turkey, she raised her voice and shouted: "Gendo, are you planning on sitting in front of that computer all day long? The turkey's getting cold!"

"Coming, honey!" another voice replied, a voice that Gendo recognized as his own. The door on the other side of the room opened, and a younger Gendo entered the room. He didn't have a beard yet.

"Sorry I kept you waiting," he smiled as he and Yui hugged. "I had to send this mail to Fuyutsuki."

"Sensei isn't working today," Yui snickered. "He's probably celebrating at home with his family. Forget about work for a moment. It's Christmas!"

"You know I can't take this American customs seriously, Yui," Gendo sighed. He then looked at the decorations. "However, I must say that you did a good job."

Yui rolled her eyes. "Gendo, how many times do I have to tell you, the Americans did NOT invent this holiday. Now come and sit down with me. I didn't cook this turkey just for myself, you know?"

While the younger Gendo enjoyed his meal in the company of his future wife, the older Gendo watched his past self. 'It is so strange to watch me doing this...' he thought. 'It's even stranger that I almost forgot about this day...'

"So you see?" Shinji asked. "There has been a time when you enjoyed Christmas. Don't tell me you didn't like the candles, the decorations, the warmth... and wasn't the turkey tasty?"

Gendo crossed his arms. "That was different. I didn't want to ruin everything for Yui. She prepared all of this, just for the two of us... it wouldn't have been right to make all of this go to waste."

"But that wasn't the only time you enjoyed a nice Christmas..." Shinji said. "Don't you remember?"

* * *

The warm light surrounded them again, and again their surroundings changed. This time, they were in what looked like a big mansion, with many people standing around, drinking, eating, laughing and singing songs. Again, there were Christmas decorations everywhere.

"Know where we are?" Shinji asked.

"Yes, I know," Gendo muttered. "This is the old manor of Fuyutsuki's brother... he invited him for this party and told him he could bring a few friends. I was quite surprised when he chose Yui and me..."

Shinji pointed to a corner where Gendo's past self... now a couple of years older... was standing, a glass of wine in his hand. Yui, now wearing a red vest, pulled his arm as she urged him to follow her. "C'mon, everyone is dancing!"

"You know I can't dance..." young Gendo said bashfully.

"Hey, it's never too late to learn, you know? Look, Naoko can't dance either and is that stopping her?" She grinned and gestured at another woman, whose dancing partner winced every time she stepped on his toes. But that didn't stop them from having fun.

"I don't know..." Gendo sighed.

Yui pouted. "You want me to tell everyone about your Star Trek underwear?"

"N-no, that won't be necessary," Gendo said hastily as he followed a giggling Yui.

Gendo turned red as he faced Shinji. "You... you'll never tell anything about this, do you hear me?"

Shinji chuckled. "So you were a nerd, what about it? So's my classmate Kensuke, and we're pals. But don't you see? You were having fun, in the company of others. Mom merely showed you the way."

And for a while, they watched how the young, early Ikari couple danced to the music a younger Fuyutsuki was playing on a guitar.

After a while, Gendo sighed and said: "You know, this won't change a thing. I might have been like this some time ago, but that's the past." He looked at Shinji sternly. "There's no room for such things in the world we live in now. The Angels have come to destroy everything, we can't focus on time-wasting festivities."

"This isn't just about Christmas, father," Shinji said, shaking his head. "This is about you. You have changed, have become bitter after mother's death... when was the last time you have ever changed a pleasant word with anyone?"

"There are quite a few people I respect, as long as they respect me," Gendo coldly shot back.

"Respect isn't the same," Shinji sighed. "But you are right, this is the past... however, don't we all learn from the past? But I can see that this is enough for tonight. I doubt any other memory will change your resolve. For now, let us return back to the present."

* * *

And in another flash of light, they were brought back to the present, to Gendo's dark bedroom.

"I will leave you now," Shinji said as he floated back up into the air. "But at least try to think about what you saw tonight."

"You are not really my son... are you?" Gendo asked.

The spirit turned around and smiled. "Maybe not. But does that make a difference?"

And with those words, he disappeared.


	3. The second spirit

The first thing Gendo did in the morning was checking if his wife's diary was still at its place. It was still in the drawer where he had locked it. He thought about it for a moment, then got dressed and prepared for work.

Today was once again another test and when Shinji arrived, he put on his plugsuit as usual and got ready to board the entry plug... but looked up in bewilderment when he was being approached by none other than his father.

Shinji scratched his head. This was highly unusual... his father rarely approached him directly. If he had any sort of orders, he'd give them over the speakers or tell them to Misato instead.

"I need to talk to you for a minute... in private," NERV's commander told his son, his hands behind his back. As usual, there wasn't a hint of emotion in his voice.

"Sir?" Misato and Fuyutsuki both exchanged a confused look.

"It won't take long... come along, Shinji," Gendo said.

"Um... sure," Shinji nodded as he followed his father, wondering if there was anything he had done wrong.

In Gendo's office, the commander closed the door and turned around the key. Shinji suddenly felt nervous, like a trapped animal.

He waited until his father sat down at his desk, but Gendo did nothing like that. Instead, he stepped in front of his son and looked at him sternly through his glasses.

"Shinji... where were you tonight? And I mean especially the time between one and two o'clock."

The Third Child blinked. "Uh... at Misato-san's apartment, as usual. That's where I always sleep, after all..."

Gendo searched for any hint that Shinji was lying in his son's eyes, but could find none. If there was anything he knew about his son, it was that he was a poor liar. Also, Gendo knew enough about lying and trickery to realize when someone didn't tell him the whole truth.

That left the question: If it wasn't Shinji who showed him all these scenes of the past... who was it?

The Ghost of Christmas Past? Gendo mentally snorted at that idea. While the images of his youth had made him wonder, he still wasn't ready to believe in the supernatural.

"Um, father?" Shinji asked. "Why do you ask? Did something happen?"

Gendo realized that his son must have looked at him for a few minutes now. "Nothing you should be concerned with," he simply replied. "That is all. Now, to your Evangelion Unit!"

"Y-yes, sir!" Shinji quickly saluted. Father or not, this was still his superior officer.

* * *

That night, Gendo personally checked every door, every exit and every security camera... he only went to bed after making sure that no human intruder would be able to reach HQ... especially not his bedroom.

Part of him didn't really believe that these security measures would be enough to stop the second guest Yui had announced.

At eleven o'clock, he was woken by a loud noise... it sounded as if someone was pounding against the metal locker that was standing in the corner of his room... from the inside.

From his bed, Gendo watched the absurd scene as the locker shook around, being moved by an invisible force. After a while, an irate voice yelled from the inside: "Would it hurt you to get that lazy ass off your bed and help me already? I'm stuck!"

Gendo was so baffled that he actually complied, got out of bed and opened the locker door. Together with the commander's belongings that had been stuffed in there, a red-headed girl clad in what looked like a toga worn in ancient Rome came falling out, crashing headfirst into the floor.

"Verdammt, that HURT!" the double of Asuka Soryu Langley cussed as she picked herself up from the ground. Angrily, she wiped some dirt from her toga. "Did you ever think of cleaning up in there every once in a while? That place is a dump!"

Gendo approached her. "You are..."

"The Ghost of Christmas Present, what do I look like?" Asuka huffed as she turned around to face him. "Who did you expect, the Easter Bunny?"

Gendo frowned. "Watch your tone... as your Commander, you still have to..."

"Ah, stuff it, jerk!" Asuka shouted, not giving him any time to finish his sentence. "I'm not here so you can boss me around like you usually do with me... and all of NERV's staff, for that matter. I'm here to give you a little tour."

"I have no intention of leaving this room tonight," Gendo said. "What my son showed me last night was enough, I do not need to repeat that foolish experience."

"Baka-Shinji only showed you the sentimental stuff of the past, idiot!" Asuka said. "I'm here to give you the hard stuff, the undeniable truth of the present!"

"Say as you wish. I still won't leave this room," Gendo proclaimed, turning his back to her. He was aware that this behavior was a bit childish... yet he had no intention of playing along with the little game of these so-called 'spirits'.

A mischievous smirk appeared on Asuka's face. "I was hoping you'd say that..."

About four seconds later, Gendo found himself flying through the air. Before he was able to even gasp, he crash-landed inside his metal locker. With a groan, he tried to stand back up.

Asuka didn't give him any chance. "Move it, jerk!" she shouted, kicking him in the rear, so that he fell down again. "Get that ass in motion. Do you think I have all night?"

"Let... go... of me..." Gendo mumbled as his face was mashed against cold metal. The spirit had picked him up from the ground and was now pressing his whole body against the inside of the locker as she was climbing in again herself.

"Dang, you really need to buy a wardrobe," she grumbled. "But this will have to do for now..." She grinned and closed the door behind her. "And here we go!"

Gendo had no idea what was happening to them as the locker shook around. If it wasn't for the spirit's toga-clad body being pressed into his own, he'd be falling down again for sure.

* * *

"Well, here we are," Asuka smirked as she opened the door. Bright light shone into the locker. "Now get out."

Gendo mumbled something. It wasn't too clear what it was, since his face was still pressed against cold metal, but it sounded unpleasant. Asuka frowned.

"I said get your ass out there, jerk!" she yelled as she tossed him outside. And once again, Gendo found himself flying through the air, this time landing headfirst in a pile of snow.

He cursed to himself angrily as he climbed to his feet. "How dare you..."

"What? Call you a jerk?" the red-headed spirit sneered. "I'm calling you a jerk as much as I want, jerk, because that's what you are, jerk... a jerk!"

Gendo then realized that they weren't in his bedroom anymore. The locker was standing near the entrance gate of a place he had rarely seen in person, but which he recognized nevertheless: It was the school Shinji, Asuka and Rei were attending.

"What are we doing here?" he asked the spirit.

"Shut your trap," Asuka shouted with a grin. She loved commanding the commander around. "And watch closely." She gestured towards the gate, where three children were standing, who seemed to be Shinji's age.

"I hope you remember to study during the holidays," the brown-haired girl with the twin ponytails just told the two boys. "Sensei wouldn't want you to forget everything he taught us over Christmas."

"Give us a break, class rep," the boy with the glasses sighed. "We're finally out off this hell hole, and you still want us to study? Forget it! Yo Koji... did you also get the invitation for the party at Misato-san's place?"

"I sure did," the more athletic-looking boy nodded. "This will be one heck of a party... with Misato, there's gonna be more than enough booze for everyone!"

"Hey, we're underage! We're not allowed to drink yet," the class representative shouted. "Looks like it's up to me again to make sure you boys stay out of trouble..."

"What, you're coming too, Hikari?" Toji asked in surprise.

"Why not? You know Asuka's my friend. Why shouldn't I be invited, too? It took me by surprise, however... I didn't expect NERV to give them enough free time for this... do they even get to stay home at Christmas?"

"Ya know, I seriously doubt it," Kensuke huffed. "From what I've heard about Shinji's father, he's gotta be the worst slave driver in town..."

"Why, the nerve..." Gendo grumbled from afar.

"Quiet!" Asuka commanded. "The best part is yet to come."

"Well, I'm sure he will give at least Shinji a day off," Hikari spoke up. "I mean, he is his father..."

"You think that means anything?" Toji huffed. "There's a reason why Shinji never talks about his father with us. Misato's taking care of all the parenting issues... I don't think Mr. NERV Commander guy will ever lift his lazy butt from his office chair."

Asuka broke out in laughter after hearing that, while Gendo's face slowly turned red. "That's not true," he grumbled. "I'm often called away from NERV headquarters for emergency reasons and..."

"Yeah, but it's still funny," Asuka giggled. "But you see? All of them have their holidays, even their parents and everyone else in Tokyo-3... so why not the NERV employees?"

"Safety reasons," Gendo replied, crossing his arms. "What are we supposed to do when an Angel attacks and there's no one ready to defend the city?"

"Point taken... but it's not like the security of the city is your main problem," Asuka said, looking at him strangely. "Your only goal is that the Evangelions turn all those Angels into trash... so that your precious 'Instrumentality' plan can proceed.

Gendo froze. How many things did these spirits know about him?

"Pretty much everything," the spirit replied as she read his thoughts. "No, get back into the locker. There's another place we need to visit before we head back."

Gendo stared at the dark, cramped inside of the metal locker. "I'm not going back in there," he said.

Asuka was going to throw him in again, but then she stopped herself in time and smirked. "Fiiine... I can just leave without you. You can stay here, in the cold and snow... only clad in your jammies. Is that what you want?"

"Let's leave already..." Gendo sighed, ignoring the broad grin on the half-german spirit's face.

* * *

Another bumpy ride later, the locker landed again... this time inside a building. Gendo opened the door and looked around. He didn't recognize the apartment. "Where are we now?"

"Same day, couple of hours later," Asuka said as she pushed him out so she could get out of the locker as well. "I knew you wouldn't recognize this place... after all, you never came to visit your son, right?"

It took a moment for Gendo to understand. "This is... Major Katsuragi's apartment?"

"Bingo! The candidate wins 30 points!" Asuka smirked. "Tell me, did it ever cross your mind to come and see how your son lives like?"

"That is of no importance, as long as he's doing his job as an Evangelion pilot," Gendo stated. "Emotionally attaching yourself to family members that have no desire of doing the same is foolish and naive."

A moment later, the commander was holding his swollen head, where Asuka's fist had left a nasty bruise. "What did you do that for?" he complained.

"I felt like it..." Asuka gritted her teeth. "Now shut up and watch!"

Together, they witnessed the party that Shinji's classmates had spoken of earlier. Even though the apartment was barely big enough for the three people and the one water fowl living inside, Misato had still bought a small tree that was standing in one corner. The major herself, together with Shinji, Asuka and the three classmates, were sitting around the table, playing a board game. For a moment, Gendo looked back and forth between the spirit Asuka and the Asuka sitting at the table.

"How can you be here and there?"

"Baka. I'm the Spirit of Christmas Present, I'm everywhere you can find joy. Why do you think we've been avoiding your place?"

Gendo frowned as he looked at the table. "What are they doing?"

"Ssshhh!" the spirit waved her hand. "This looks like fun... take a look!"

Misato was rolling the dice and moved her figure. She then drew a card and read the question on it: "If you had the chance to give Player 3 any order he or she had to follow... what would it be?"

Shinji gulped. He was Player 3 in this game.

Misato grinned. "Well, I would order dear Shinji to go to the nearest bar... and do what I would do in such a place!"

"That would include flirting with any member of the opposite gender he comes across and drink one beer after another until he's lying unconscious on the ground..." Asuka murmured.

Everyone around the table snickered while Shinji blushed. "I don't think I would be able to follow that order..."

"Ah, you need to unwind every now and then," Misato smiled. "You're a nice boy, Shinji, but you can be so stiff and boring."

"Listen to her, Shin-man!" Toji laughed. "She's the wisest woman in town!"

"Why do we have to watch this foolishness?" Gendo grumbled. "We should leave..."

The spirit glared at him. "You know, it wouldn't hurt you to do the same. Maybe that would teach you that work and 'Instrumentality' are not all there is to life. And look, they're having fun... being stuck in that hellhole of HQ can be truly depressing, don't you agree?"

"Your turn, Toji!" Shinji pushed the dice over to his friend.

"Right," Toji smirked as he rolled them. Like Misato, he came to a point where he had to draw a card. He read the question: "If you had one free wish, what is it you would wish for?"

Suddenly, a serious expression appeared on his face as he looked down at the card.

"Toji-kun?" Misato asked, surprised at the boy's reaction. "What's wrong?"

"My... my wish would be that I want my little sister to be able to walk again..." he quietly said.

Everyone looked at him with a shocked expression. Shinji closed his eyes and sighed.

"What's going on?" Gendo wondered. "What about his sister?"

Spirit Asuka sighed. "The first time Shinji fought an Angel... several buildings were destroyed and many citizens were injured... or worse. Toji's sister was hurt so bad that she had to be taken to hospital. The doctors saved her life, but her legs were crushed... she will probably never be able to walk again."

Gendo became silent. He knew that the battles with the Angels couldn't be controlled in a way that safety for all citizens was assured.

"This is war," he said. "Casualties are to be expected."

"Rubbish," Asuka mumbled. "Don't tell me you actually care about what you heard about Toji's sister... but then again, aren't you doing all of this just to see your wife again... who also became a casualty?"

"That... is different," Gendo claimed. "Besides, with Instrumentality, we will all be united as one... Toji's sister won't ever feel any pain again."

"You're such an egoistical bastard..." the spirit whispered. "Did you ever ask the people if they want this? So many things will be destroyed... things that humanity created... towns... culture... the concepts of love and marriage will lose all of their importance... Do you think I would hesitate if I had a chance to see my dead mother again?"

Gendo looked at her in surprise. He realized he never really gave the other pilot's past any thought. "Wouldn't you?"

"I may not be the real Asuka, but I have her feelings for this night," the spirit whispered. "And I know she wishes nothing more than to relive the moments of her childhood... with her mother's mind intact, that is. But if she knew, if she realized what you and SEELE are planning, she would never accept the prize for that. Neither would Shinji, even if it meant to be with his mother again. That's why they are good people... and you... are a jerk!"

Gendo couldn't think of any reply.

"It's time to head back..." Asuka said darkly. "You wouldn't want to miss your final guest..."

* * *

The trip back into NERV HQ wasn't as bumpy as the two rides before that. In fact, Gendo felt like he and the spirit were standing inside a very dark elevator. When they arrived, he simply stepped out of the locker and turned around to face the spirit one last time.

It was so dark in the locker that he couldn't see Asuka's face. "Is there a way... Toji's sister can be helped?"

"A way that doesn't include Instrumentality, you mean?" the spirit asked in a calm voice. "Possibly... there are bionical implants that would allow her to walk like a normal human... but those are expensive. Very expensive. And Toji's family isn't exactly rich..."

It became even darker. Gendo was barely able to see the outline of the spirit's body. "I'm going now... I hope what I showed you opened your eyes at least a bit, Gendo Ikari... there's nothing left to do for me but to leave the rest to Wondergirl..."

And then, she disappeared.

Gendo was confused. Wondergirl? What did she mean?

Just then, his gaze fell upon the electronic clock. It was twelve o'clock... midnight.

A shiver ran down the commander's spine as he felt something approaching him from behind. He turned to see a cloud of darkness, out of which stepped a thin figure, clad in a black cloak that hid all of her body. Only the lower part of her face was visible... the girl in the cloak was as pale as a ghost.

"I am the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come," the figure whispered.

Gendo froze. He knew that voice. "Rei?" he muttered.


	4. The third spirit

"So... you are the Spirit of Christmas yet to come," Gendo said. "I admit, I should have seen this coming, after my son and Miss Soryu as the other two spirits... but tell me, what is it exactly that you wish to accomplish?"

The spirit stayed silent. Except for his introduction, the figure in the cloak hadn't sayed a single word. She merely gestured at the door, which was now wide open. Gendo could see nothing but blackness behind it.

"Why won't you answer me?" Gendo asked. "If you are anything like the real Rei, you would give me an answer. She always listens to my commands."

The spirit did not reply. Instead, she repeated the gesture towards the door. Realizing that he couldn't make her tell him anything, Gendo just decided to get this over with and marched towards the door.

Rei followed him into the darkness. It took Gendo a while until he was able to see anything again.

It was a wasteland. Nothing more than a vast sea made of an orange goop, with a couple of islands made of dry land rising from it. In the far distance, he was able to see the silhouette of a towering, pale figure, which somehow resembled an Angel... and Rei.

"So... my dreams will be realized," Gendo sighed. "No matter what happens to Earth, Yui and I will be reunited..." He took a step closer to the orange mass in front of him. There was no sign that this chaotic mass had once been what all the bodies of humanity were made of.

The spirit raised her hand and gestured to the right. Now Gendo saw another island rising out of the LCL... and he saw two people crouching there. That was, only his son, Shinji, was crouching... in his arms, he was holding the comatose form of Asuka Langley Soryu.

"What is this?" he mumbled. "Why did they choose this? Why aren't they joining everyone else? Does Shinji think he can save her all by himself?"

A whispering voice was in the air, and somehow Gendo wasn't too sure if it was the spirit who replied or someone else...

'Shinji never had anyone. Even as an Evangelion pilot, all he had were his fellow pilots and friends from school. Who else would he turn to? Who else would he want to be with? With Rei and Misato gone, who was left?'

"He could have joined them..." Gendo said quietly. "They are all there..."

'This is not what this is about. We are the Spirits of Christmas. Humanity needs compassion. Compassion is the Spirit of Christmas. Without compassion, humanity is lost. Just like this boy. You know what Keel Lorenz wants? He desires true Instrumentality, with the spirits of the people truly being destroyed... unlike your vision, where everyone will be reunited. His vision means the true death of everyone. Can you say for sure that this is what will happen?'

"You tell me..." Gendo replied, looking at her. "You are the Spirit of the Future, aren't you?"

The spirit didn't reply. The eerie silence was unnerving to Gendo. Nervously, he turned around. "I mean... it has to be! Everything I did... would have been for nothing... right?"

Once again, the whispers were filling the air.

'If you don't realize that everyone needs compassion... love... someone they can rely on... you will end up alone."

"Never..." Gendo closed his eyes. "Some people are eternally loyal to me... I know that. Rei..."

Suddenly, they were surrounded by darkness once again. Then, a bright cone of light shone down on two figures standing in front of them. One of them was the true Rei Ayanami. The other one... was Gendo himself. Gendo saw that Rei was in bad shape, her right arm was slowly coming apart.

"I am not your puppet!"

This hit Gendo like a slap, and even his future self seemed to stumble backwards as Rei threw him these words in his face.

"I'm not you..." she said. She slowly stepped back and floated upwards, into the darkness.

"Rei!" Gendo's future self shouted. "Rei, please wait!"

"No..." Rei replied. "Another Ikari is calling for me..."

And then everything was black again.

Gendo had collapsed to his feet. His glasses were falling to the floor. He hid his face in his hands. He somehow knew that this was no illusion. This was the truth. This was the future... or at least a possible version.

"Why?" he asked. "Why did Rei do this? Why did she betray me? Did she choose Shinji over me? Why?"

'Because... Shinji felt compassion. While everyone else treated her as a tool... he saw her... as a human.'

'Compassion is everything, Gendo Ikari...'

'Without feelings for other people, humans cannot exist...'

"But... but I have feelings... Yui..."

'Yui Ikari... is dead.'

"But she... she would understand. It won't matter anymore... as soon as we are together... she knows... she..."

Suddenly, he froze. He could remember Yui's words, just before her spirit had vanished.

"We won't see each other again after this... not in this life."

And then he had the most horrifying vision yet... he saw himself, in the grasp of Evangelion Unit 01's hand... and then... his body was crushed.

Gendo's upper body collapsed to the floor. "But why? What did I do wrong? I had it all planned. What do I do? What if I am wrong? What if Lorenz is right?"

He turned to face the spirit. "Spirit, please tell me..."

But the cloaked figure was gone. Gendo was all alone in the darkness. For a moment, he felt truly helpless... then everything went black before his eyes.

However, in the corner of his mind, he believed to hear a final, silent whisper...

'Do as you wish. Instrumentality might still be humanity's final hope. Maybe not. However... focus on the present. Focus on those around you. Focus on your feelings... compassion... love... and you will know what to do...'

And then he woke up.


End file.
